King Kowalski
by LarkroseLukos
Summary: Due to a horrific lab test, Julian and Kowalski have switched minds! The penguins have to deal with whiny Julian while Maurice wonders why his king keeps asking him for complex machines and keeps nibbling on raw fish.


Disclaimer: I do not own PoM or any of the characters.

***

It was late at night. All of the animals were sleeping, save for two. Deep in the heart of the penguin HQ, chaos was about to be unleashed.

"Okay, ringtail." Kowalski said, plopping a dish down on his head.

"Mind switcher? I am king, I do need not to have my brainy part switched up." King Julian crossed his arms, but didn't take off the metal dish.

"Relax. This is just a test run. You will be switching minds with this field mouse. If I'm successful, then you can leave. If it doesn't work… you could explode."

"Okay." King Julian waited for the penguin to walk over to button to activate the blender. "Oh, be hurrying it up already!" he gave Kowalski a kick.

"Ahh!" Kowalski exclaimed as slipped and hit the button. Then, in the impact, a shelf above gave way and a metal dish fell on his head.

***

"Huh?" Kowalski cracked open one eye. That was strange. Why was he in the lemur habitat? And why was he on a throne?

"That's weird. My voice! What's happened to my voice?" Kowalski said. No, it couldn't be. He grabbed a mirror and looked at himself.

"Oh SWEET HEAVENS!"

***

"Come on, Kowalski. Wake up." Skipper shook his friend from his bunk.

"Uh, no. A king does not needing to be waking up for some silly penguin."

"Don't you backsass me!" Skipper said.

"Uh, why is my voice so deepy and penguiny? Blibba blibba blibba. She sells my shells shy the shehorse."

Skipper looked confused. "Kowalski, are you okay?"

"Why do you keep calling me Molski? That is a silly penguin name." Then Julian looked down. "Wait! I am a silly penguin! Yes! Uh… no!"

"You can't be Julian, Kowalski." said Private. "When Roger and Rico switched, Roger still had his voice."

Skipper examined Julian. "I guess we'll keep you in quarintine until this mess is figured out."

"But Skippah. If Kowalski is really Julian, then where is the real Kowalski?"

***

"Can we get you anything, King?" Maurice asked.

"Uh… yeah! I'll need a twenty four inch by sixteen inch hard drive, one microwave, one powerdrill…"

"When did you learn those words, King?"

"I've always known them. Anyways, some lemonade, a chew toy… and one empty bathtub."

Maurice got a strange look on his face. "Uh, sure, King."

***

"Shouldn't we just go too the lemur's and ask Kowalski to fix it?" Private asked.

"That would be affirmative, Private. Me and Rico are leaving now. But you'll need to keep an eye on Ringtail/Kowalski."

"Okay, sir!" Private saluted.

***

"I'm afraid I can't help you." Kowalski said, messing with his apposable thumbs.

"Kowalski, you have to listen to me! You risk insubordination!"

"What if I don't want to switch back, huh?"

"Of course you do!"

Kowalski shook his head. "Get out of my palace."

"What did you just say too me?"

"Get out. Maurice?"

Maurice came out holding some ray gun thing that Kowalski had built.

Skipper growled but turned away. "You'll be sorry! Wait till Mort realizes you have feet!"

Kowalski rolled his eyes and turned back to Maurice. "Fetch me Doris."

"Are you kidding? I can't carry a dolphin!" Maurice gasped.

"I can!" Mort squeled happily.

"Never mind. Bring me an electric socket, a notepad, a typewriter…"

***

"Since Kowalski retained your… your selfishness, Ringtail, it's possible you've retained his smarts. I need you too fix this machine. Here's a notepad and one of Kowalski's magnifying glasses. Now start inventing!" Skipper explained to Julian.

"You know what would really be helping me to invent?" asked Julian. "I want the vomity penguin to give me a foot massage. And I want a floaty chair and leaf bed."

"Okay," Skipper reluctantly agreed. "But you better give me a mind swapping machine!"

***

"I'm getting hungry, Maurice. Do you mind fetching me some fish?" asked Kowalski.

"Sur- What? Fish, as in raw fish?" Maurice exclaimed.

"Yes. Of course. What else would I eat?"

_Those penguins have something to do with this. _"Yes, king." Maurice sighed and went to get it.

Meanwhile, over at the penguin HQ, Skipper and Private were fanning King Julian as he drew on his notepad.

"Hey guys!" Marlene said, climbing over their fence and swimming through the water.

She climbed up on the stone platform. "Uh, why are you fanning Kowalski?"

"That's confi-" Skipper began, but Private cut him off.

"Kowalski and Julian switched minds."

Marlene looked confused. "Uh… I'm going to go now. I'm not getting mixed up in this."

"Come back soon!" Julian called after her.

Lemur's Habitat:

Maurice and Mort watched as Kowalski power-drilled and screwed in every little part into the blender. They watched as he carefully and gently took the hard drive and pushed into it's place that he'd carved earlier. And they yawned as he told them about what this does and how this works. About an hour later, Mort fell asleep. Maurice followed after that.

And Kowalski didn't realize his audience was sleeping, so he kept on talking and talking for about ten minutes until he fell asleep.

Penguin HQ 9:30:

Skipper pulled out his Skipper's Log and carefully whispered into it his entry. Private was slumped over on his shoulder, while Rico was in the corner, snoring loudly and accosionally laughing maniacally in his sleep.

"Skipper's log, nine hundred hours. I have pampered and coaxed Ringtail into working on a mind swapper. He's doing that right now. I'll check on him in the morning." He yawned. "Now I'm falling asleep. Note, Kowalski is still persistent and refuses to switch back. I've got my hopes high on Ringtail. Now that Kowalski is gone, we don't have a strategist, so Rico's filling in. But so far, his only options are "Kaboom!" so I don't have by money bet on him for a permanent replacement. Not like we need one. Hopefully, Kowalski will come to his senses and come back. If not, I'd rather have him not here than have- yawn- a bratty king Kowalski."

And with a click, Skipper was soon asleep.

Morning, Lemur Habitat:

"Here's the boomy box, king." Maurice said with a sigh, plopping down the music player in front of Kowalski.

"It's called a music processor. A 2003 original, to be excact."

"Is that bad?" asked Mort in his whiny voice.

"No." Kowalski flipped on the player. Loud pop music started blaring.

"Ugh!" Kowalski hit a switch and Mozart started playing.

"Much better." Kowalski said, turning around to work on his invention.

"Are you sure you're feeling okay?" asked Maurice.

"Do I appear ill?" asked Kowalski.

"Well… no, but that's not what I meant…"

Kowalski raised up a paw. "Talk to the flipper." he said.

"Uh, King? You have PAWS!" Maurice lost his temper for a moment.

Kowalski looked at his hand. "Oh, right." He laughed. "Scurry along then."

Maurice walked off, headed for the penguin habitat.

Penguin HQ:

"What exactly are we looking at, Ringtail?" asked Skipper. Rico blathered an agreement.

"It's an awesome machine!" Julian said. "Go inside."

Skipper pushed Private into the cement box. The penguin walked out and Julian slammed some tape on him. He drew a very bad picture of himself on the tape.

"There!" he said. "Awseomified!"

Skipper sighed and rolled his eyes. "Come on, men. Let's go talk some sense into Kowalski."

"You're not going anywhere until I get answers!" Maurice said, stepping out of the nonlit area of the HQ.

"What kind of answers?" asked Skipper. "If it's who we are, I can't answer. If it's why we're here, I can't answer. If it's why Rico can't talk… I don't know the answer. If it-"

"King Julian has been eating fish and listening to classical music and… and inventing things. Are you trying to change him into a penguin or something?"

"Hey, look! It's my chunky monkey!" Julian ran/waddled out and hugged Maurice.

"Uh… can you get him off me?" Maurice asked, motioning towards Julian.

"We're on it. Rico, explain to him the problem." Skipper said, and he and Private pushed Julian into the back.

When they came back, Maurice had a disturbed look in his eyes.

Rico was blathering and ranting about something that obviously (to Maurice) was not an answer.

"I'm staying clear of you penguins! Keep your crazyiness to yourself!" Maurice said, backing away with each word.

"You want to know what's really going on?" said Skipper. "Kowalski and your king switched minds."

Maurice had already had gone.

"Anyways… come on, boys. The lemur habitat awaits!"

***

There it is! There is some confusion, but I tried to make it long. Stay tuned for chapter two!

~Lukos


End file.
